How To Clean A Hotel Room

The checkout-
Enter room. Strip the bed, remove dirty towels from bathroom, check drawers for left behinds, empty trash containers and check hotel coffee pot to make sure it is still in the room or hasn't been used to cook drugs in. Pocket any money.
Check the shower curtain for dirt by rubbing it against itself. If its dirty you'll know. Remove if it is dirty, otherwise close it.
Gather needed sheets, towels, soaps, etc. and place on dresser. Having it there ahead of time will save you needless running back and forth.

Repeat for you remaining checkouts.

When you are ready to clean the room start by making the bed. If you work for a hotel with brains there will be no fitted sheets. Most hotels these days don't have brains. I'm sorry. The easiest way to put on a pillowcase is to hold the pillow under your chin and use both hands to put the case on, a quick shake and you're done. Finish cleaning the room making sure it looks as not used as possible.

The stay over-
Try to enter room. Push hard to shove the suitcase blocking the door out of the way. Trip over pizza boxes. Navigate around more suitcases. Look at bed piled with guest's belongings. Get note that says why you are not making the bed and set in easy to see place on bed.

Enter bathroom. Stumble out choking. Take deep breath and re-enter. Flush toilet. Spray air freshener liberally and wait outside. Return to bathroom. Get on hotel phone and call front desk for maintenance.

Think about vacuuming and laugh.

Return to now working bathroom and clean. Pretend you actually cleaned the room and leave.

The next day-See the guest that was the previous day's stay over as he's checking out. Notice that he's drop dead handsome, but you know what a true stinker he really is. Smile as he walks by.